So today started a bit more slowly than planned, but we mad it out the hotel by about ten and into the iHop. Where I consumed pancakes. It was then back into the car and out of Los Angeles. We then spent the first half hour taking wrong intersections but soon settled into it. Apart from a quick pee stop about three-quarters in it was a continuous journey.

I must admit, the scenery was breathtaking. Drive was uneventful. The roads were incredibly straight.

They say that Las Vegas appears out of the desert, I wish it would vanish right back into it again. We got to the hotel no problem. Valet parking, I’m sure that’s the last I’ll see of th sat-nav. Checkin was fine, the room, or suite is fine. It has a jacuzzi and a TV in the bathroom mirror. We had a bath and then took the shuttle bus further down the strip. We then walked to the Planet Hollywood theatre to see Britney Spears. The show was fine, although I did get jumped on by security for videoing the whole thing on a GoPro and he got me to delete it all. I’ll have to wait until I’m home now to do a file recovery on it, but should be okay. Jamie didn’t really enjoy it. Said she didn’t put a lot of effort in. We then walked back towards the hotel and managed to eat at a rather nice Italian at the Venation.

Now here’s my problem with the place. It’s just so tacky, so full of opulence, just so vulgar. You can’t walk down the street without someone trying to thrust a leaflet in your hand about some strip joint or titty bar. It exists for one purpose, thats to take as much money as possible from as many people as possible, to give to no doubt the few. Which is ironic, when we are staying in Donald Trumps place.

Do yourself a favour, if you’ve ever seen the place on the telly and thought it looked great, then savour those memories and don’t come here. I can’t wait to get out of the awful place.

We woke early again. This tends to happen when we go to the US. I don’t know if it’s because we go to bed a lot earlier than we do at home. I think it was well before one when we went to bed last night. Anyway we got ready early and then found out the park opened at 10. We made it there for about half past. Went straight to the new ‘Cars’ ride, there was a massive queue for the fast pass so we joined the stand-by line which actually moved pretty quickly. We got on the ride about and hour and a half later. It was pretty good actually. Nicely themed and executed. Went from there on to California Screamin and then on to Tower of Terror. Managed to get Go-Pro footage from all of them. We had a light lunch which turned into a vast vat of turkey and salad. Then I got my face painted as a tiger and we saw a couple of parades and shows. We did a couple more rides and then it was time to eat yet again. Jamie had already booked for this fine dining place and we had great fish and seafood. Plus we had a pass to get into the best viewing area for the evening show. The show was excellent, even if I did get a bit wet. Great day all in all. Only downer was I got shouted at by some trumped up bird when taking pictures of Goofy. “Sir, if you want to take a picture you have to join the back of the queue.” Now if I wasn’t in a relaxed state I would have just punched the bitch, but as I was standing there in a Disney hat with my face painted like a tiger I decided it was just best to bugger off.

Came back to the hotel and then started to edit the four hours of footage we shot. Did a very rough ‘highlights’ edit which is uploading to YouTube now. I’ll do a more detailed one of the parades at a later date. So had a quick shower and then shot down to the bar as its the only place I get free wi-fi.

Started the upload ect. A quick time-out here. The barman is the same man I saw two years ago, he’s been tending bar at this hotel for thirty-six years. He’s a Mexican chap, but is truly lovely. I came down at eleven-fifty, it closes at twelve. I ordered a beer, he said he was closing up, so queued me up another one. I’m still here at twelve-thirty as the video is processing. He’s left me with a big cup of crisps and a coke to be going on with. He says he’s sixty-six, I hope he’s here if we come back in another couple of years, such a lovely chap.

So tomorrow, really, the road trip really starts and we move on to Vegas. It’s going to be fun, it’s been fun already. The only thing I fear with my bi-polar is the hell of a crash that will come at the end of it, that may very well finish me off. But for the moment, I’m having a great time.

So last nights plan, went, well according to plan. So we woke up at a sensible time. I had coffee. No cereal, so instead had to put up with wine gums. Ventured out and set a course for a Walmart. Made it there successfully, but didn’t end up buying anything. We then ventured to our second mall of the day. Looked at lots of cheap video cameras, was trying to buy the Zoom, but it was incomplete and basically really old. After chatting to the sales guy, ended up buying a Hero 3 white addition plus a couple of extra mounts. We then ventured to another mall, found a Hot Topic and bought lots of cool gear. Just pissed that there isn’t one of these in the UK. We had lunch at some weird Mexican, non Mexican place. I had salad, which was rather nice. Then relocated to an outlet centre where Jamie persuaded me to part with a couple of hundred dollars on perfume. We drove back to the hotel.

Must be stated that in today’s driving I only attempted to drive the wrong way down a road once, which to be honest is bloody good for me. The car is still in one piece.

Jamie put the go-pro on on a chest mounts and I set up the DSLR. Made a quick video which is uploading at the moment. Ended up syncing with the go-pro footage as well which worked pretty well. We then went to Downtown Disney and went shopping yet again.

Came back to the hotel. I had sex, Jamie was there, although I’m not sure he really partakes. Had a shower. We then went to a restaurant called ‘The Cheesecake Factory’. I had the chicken. Which was the size of a KFC family bucket. I ate most of the chicken. Jamie had some split platter thing which was just obscene. Afterwards of course we had cheesecake. I had some lemon and raspberry thing. Jamie had an Oreo cookie thing, which looked like about a billion calories.

It’s no wonder American’s are the size they are if they eat this shit. The fun thing is, they turn into a lard ass, then get given a mobility scooter, so they then get no exercise whatsoever, so just get even fatter. They don’t need a mobility scooter, what they need is a fucking treadmill and a good salad.

Tomorrow we are off to Disney. This evening I’m sat at the bar, which is very business. It’s run by a small Mexican guy who’s been here since the hotel opened thirty-four years ago. He’s a cool guy. He went all the way over to reception and scribbled down the wifi password for me.

So today is actually tomorrow as yesterday was a very long today. So I’ll do yesterday which for you will most likely be the end of today and today I’ll do sometime early in your tomorrow.

We got up vaguely on time, I had coffee and breakfast. No dogs to worry about. All packed up. Car journey was fairly uneventful. Had to wait a bit to get the van to the airport from the car park but soon checked into first class. We then went through security and into the Virgin Club lounge. Wow, this is the way it really should be done. We had a verity of daft soft furniture to choose from. So picked the most awkward table possible to eat from. I had a curry, Jamie had a burger. I had much beer. We then changed seats to somewhere with a plug and I edited a new video. Soon we were called for boarding, where we literally walked straight to the gate and then straight on the plane. We were shown to our booths. Which was literally a giant reclining seat together with another one masquerading as a foot stool. The whole thing could recline almost flat. You didn’t get a good view of the window though due to the angle. We were served warm champagne.

Soon we took off. Now this is an eleven hour flight so I had a couple of beers and then watched a film, the second ‘Hunger Games’ one, it was okay, but not brilliant. I felt quite tired as it was now about 9PM. So got up and pressed the conversion button, this turned the entire seat into a six-foot bed. Complete with duvet. I then got a bit of kip before being rudely awaken by some fairly pissed women at the bar. So I went and joined her. We had a good conversation for a couple of hours. I only drank chilled water as I was driving later. They eventually stopped serving us as she was getting very loud. I went back to bed. For an eleven hour flight it was over in a flash.

Then came the usual bull-fight that was immigration. Took about an hour to get through. The women wouldn’t believe the photo in the passport was me and I broke the fingerprint machine, so pretty much business as usual there. We got straight out and into the car rental bus. Few minutes journey and a bit of paperwork and we were choosing out car. Not a huge choice but a guy asked what we were looking for so I just asked for a Nissan Altima, like we had last time. He led me to a fairly new black one with just five thousand miles on the clock. We will double that. It then took me about twenty minutes and an extra bod to work out how the seat moved. Sat-nav all worked fine. We trundled to the hotel. I almost took the barrier out and kept veering to the right, so fairly normal there.

Hotel checkin was fine, room was fine. We were both fairly knackered, but walked down to Denny’s and had a burger. So went to bed at about 1AM. Woke up this morning at 9AM so all fairly good now I think. Tomorrow, today whenever, not sure what we are doing.

This morning started with breakfast followed by annotating two videos. Sarah arrived and I gave her instructions for feeding the lizards. I then finished off the videos and we took the dogs out for their last walk with us for a while. We took them to the field and chucked a ball about, they lost it after six throws. Came back. I pumped up the car tyre, which had zero psi in it. Hopefully it will hold up, it’s managed over two years like that so far. I’ve charged up the jump charger, pump thing just in case. We took the dogs to the kennels, Sasha missed us straight away, Dillon really didn’t give a shit.

Came back and started on the garden. Racked it all over and planted the grass seed. Mowed the front lawn. Mitch the hair dresser came back to work on Jamie’s hair so it wasn’t quite so orange. It looks nice now.

Then started packing. Think I’ve remembered everything. And there’s a hell of a lot of out. Had a shower and now making food.

Next update will be from LA.

This morning actually started very early for a Sunday. I had a hair appointment at 10. It was with a butch gay called Mitch. He gave me highlights and 3rd degree chemical burns. I now have the hair of a 14 year old, with the bald patches of a 60 year old. Such is progress. Actually it all looks very nice. We came back and walked the dogs. Then Jamie went to be turned into a fat 80’s boy band member and I had lunch. Then went off Geocaching. Five hours I was out. All around Filton airfield. This was all one series. Whoever set them up took a great deal of care. Each one was a bit of a puzzle. One I had to get out using a magnet. It reminded me a bit of the 80’s TV series ‘Now get out of that’, where you had to solve puzzles.

Came back and edited and uploaded two new videos. Just have the annotations to do. I’ll leave them though for a couple of weeks. Had a bath and then sat down and had pizza. Watched a film. Off to bed. Tomorrow I have to charge everything up and then pack everything. Then the journey begins….

Woke up far too early. Couldn’t get back to sleep, so fed the dogs and had breakfast. Read the paper and then fell asleep. Came up with a new song to go with ‘I dream a dream’. It goes, ‘I dream a dream where you were thin. Lots of curves and indentations’. Got up. Uploaded a new video. Took the dogs out. We were out about three hours. Had lunch. Then went into town. Picked up an SD card box (have to have one darling), two tooth brushes, a comb and some tooth paste. All items I forgot to get from Tesco’s. Came back and Jamie still wasn’t home. Apparently at McDonalds with his boyfriend Callum. Updated the sat-nav with the latest speed cameras, tested it again, which means no doubt it will fail. Updated videos on my phone. Then started on the accounts. Needed to basically pay every one for a month. All that’s now sorted apart from one credit card which I need to do a bit more research into. So that’s basically it. Hair cut and colour (yes I’m a tart) tomorrow. Walk the dogs. Do some Geocaching. Eat chicken.

It’s strange. This is the longest break I will have had from work for 23 years.

Oh yes, that video:

Today was all about one bug. Just the one. One little fucker. All day. One bug. Problem was it’s reproduction rate for me was just so low. After hours and hours I finally narrowed it down to what it could be. Went to the gym. Came back. Three hours and lots of waiting around later I found the fucker. Fixed that, which then led on to another bug, so had to fix that as well.

At least now I can go on holiday and not have a nagging bug left over for this demo. That should earn me some brownie points at least.

Made duplicates of all the important paperwork. Was going to upload a video, that will have to wait for tomorrow now. I have no great plans for the weekend, so hopefully I can get all that done then.

Bath and wine o’clock.

Started pretty early for me and got stuck straight in. Basically spent the entire day working on bugs for this upcoming demo. Had a bit of luck, managed to get the bulk of it sorted. One more day to go. Took the dogs for a walk. Actually ended up finishing at 6. Waited for the rain to stop, then headed out. Walk about four miles to go d a home check. But there wasn’t any adult home so had to abandon it. Emailed them and said they would have to pass it on to someone else. I think I’ve done my fair share of home checks, time to move on. Found one Geocache. Walked home. So that wasn’t bad, about two and a half hours. Did the shopping list. Now sat down. Trying to work out weather to have the free manicure or pedicure at the Virgin upper class lounge.

Started at 6:30, well took Sasha to daycare anyway. Went back to bed. Managed to sleep okay. Started at about 10. Today was mainly bug tracing and fixing for this upcoming demo. Cleaners arrived, did things okay. Picked up Sasha. Managed to get to Pump. Was okay. Then back to work. Spent ages on it. Cracked it eventually, but meant that I didn’t sit down to eat until gone midnight. I imagine it’s going to be the same tomorrow.