Yesterday my Ex. husband got married. They did look fantastic in their traditional Scottish kilts and tartan. Looks like they had a fantastic day, and I’m really pleased for them (no, I actually am!). I did send him a message the day before and said to ‘try not to repeat this every ten years’. As indeed we had a civil partnership is 2012, things started going to shit in 2017 and I think our civil partnership was dissolved in 2019. One thing that always kind of irritated me though…..he kept my name, surname that is. I know it’s a pain in the ass to change banks, passports etc. But I would have thought he would have changed it back to his ‘maiden’ name. But then of course there was the Sonic pun in there so I guess not. Well until today. His name has changed to that of his new husband. That’s kind of given me an odd bit of closure. It’s strange how something like that can hang over you.

I guess last night they would have found out they are both bottoms, after being good Christians of course they would have never slept with each other. I know the Ex. is technically versatile (I even put out a few times, I had less hemorrhoids then), but I think he’s certainly more of a bottom. If his new hubby is versatile then they are both in for a bloody good time. As I said, I wish them well. I’ll always remember the good times we had and maybe one day we’ll all have a beer together and do some reminiscing.

So he’s managed to form a new (and very successful) relationship over the past four years. Me? Well I had a couple of dates with a ‘lovey’ and was dumped on WhatsApp (not too fussed he had a very small dick). Had a date with another guy who had too many issues and dumped me on WhatsApp. Had a sixteen month relationship with a guy who I actually only met three times (thanks Covid). When he visited to stay for a night he brought five pairs of shoes and set up camp in the spare room. I decided that tectonic plates moved faster than this relationship, and sixteen months was a hell of a drought, so buggered off to Gran Canaria and ended that. Had probably close to a hundred random hookups in various countries. And now out of the blue, what was supposed to be a Grindr hookup ended up getting a bit pissed in the pub, followed by a nice evening in the hot tub (he didn’t like hot tubs, but does now) and movies with a Chinese. This weekend we’re having a BBQ. Is he a keeper? No idea yet. May just be a friend, he’s very local. So someone a similar age? Ah no, he’s actually a year younger than the Ex. Will I ever learn? Doubt it, plus I’m too bloody old to care now.

I often wonder if I met the Ex. now would it be different? Yes, there is no way we would have ever got together, nothing really in common other than a love of roller coasters. We did have some good times, but I think it was always a bit doomed to failure. I’m not really the ‘loving’ type, I show very little affection, I have virtually no empathy for people and I don’t have the wardrobe space to accommodate anyone else. So what am I looking for? Not sure, really don’t know, maybe just a friend to hang out with, maybe a bit more.

One things for certain, I won’t be measuring up for a kilt anytime soon and I look forward to that WhatsApp message.